A Guide to Strengthening Your Relationship
Do you know what to do if your relationship is falling apart?
Relationships are intricate mosaics of shared memories, emotions, and bonds. Yet, like any intricate artwork, they can develop cracks over time. If you find yourself gazing at the widening fissures in your relationship, wondering if the beautiful picture you once had is falling apart, know that you are not alone.
Statistics indicate that numerous couples face challenges that seem insurmountable at any given time. A study from the American Psychological Association shows that approximately 40-50% of married couples in the United States divorce, highlighting the prevalence of relationship struggles. However, these numbers also reflect opportunities for growth, understanding, and renewal.
This blog post 'what to do if your relationship is falling apart?' gives you further information on what to do if your relationship is teetering on the brink, supported by credible sources and easy-to-understand strategies.
Here we go!
1. Acknowledge the Situation
The first step in confronting any problem like 'what to do if your relationship is falling apart?' is acknowledging its existence. Denial only leads to further deterioration. It is crucial to accept that your relationship is going through a challenging phase. This doesn't mean admitting defeat; it's about recognising the need for action. Transparency with yourself and your partner is the foundation upon which you can start to rebuild.
2. Communicate Openly and Honestly
Communication is the basis of any successful relationship. The Journal of Marriage and Family suggests that honest communication significantly contributes to relationship satisfaction.
Start by creating a safe space where you and your partner can express your own feelings without fear of judgment. Remember, it's not about assigning blame but understanding each other's perspectives. Usually both parties will have had some input to how its feeling, currently.
3. Seek Professional Help
There's no shame in seeking external support when finding out what to do if your relationship is falling apart. Couples therapy has been proven to be extremely effective in resolving relationship issues, with research indicating that 70% of couples benefit from this intervention. A professional can provide unbiased guidance and help you navigate problems, offering tools and strategies to strengthen your bond.
'Relate' is one I've heard positive feedback with from my clients, but there are many individuals to choose from as well. Go with who 'feels' and 'looks' right for you.
4. Invest Time in Each Other
In the hustle and bustle of daily life, couples often forget to make time for each other. I know I did! Especially after having children its even more important to have 'couple time'.
Quality time is essential as a tool of what to do if your relationship is falling apart, for reconnecting and rekindling your relationship. Plan regular date nights, engage in shared hobbies, or spend quiet time together. These moments can reignite the spark that brought you together in the first place.
5. Focus on Positive Aspects
While addressing the problems in your relationship is essential, dwelling on them can be counterproductive. Instead, focus on the positive aspects of your partnership.
What made you fall in love with each other? What are your strengths as a couple? A study that was published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology discovered that gratitude significantly predicts higher relationship satisfaction.
One tip I love is to have a 'gratitude box/jar'. Every day you write one thing down, and pop it in the jar. On date nights, you open them up and feel blessed that who you are is recognised hopefully, and if not, what needs to be worked on.
6. Work on Yourself
Individual growth is just as significant as growing together and is hugely significant in what to do if your relationship is falling apart. Personal issues can spill over into the relationship, so addressing your needs, insecurities, and aspirations can improve your partnership overall.
Whether pursuing a hobby, focusing on self-care, or setting personal goals, enhancing your well-being can positively impact your relationship.
If you want to work on relationship with yourself to positively impact your relationship with your partner, you've come to the right place - please reach out to me here!
7. Build a Culture of Appreciation and Respect
Amidst the tensions, fostering an environment of appreciation and respect is crucial. Small gestures of kindness and gratitude can significantly alter the emotional climate of a relationship. According to Dr. John Gottman, a pioneer in relationship research, the "magic ratio" is 5:1 meaning that for every negative interaction during a conflict, a happy and stable marriage has five (or more) positive interactions.
This can ultimately be as simple as saying "thank you," complimenting each other, or acknowledging your partner's efforts. Focusing on positivity reinforces the bond that keeps you together, even in tough times.
'You look fabulous tonight, wow'
'Thank you for collecting the children'
'This food you made for us is amazing, thank you'
It is all positive reinforcement of the love and gratitude you have for that person being in your life.
8. Embrace Change Together
Change is an inevitable part of life and relationships. People grow and evolve, and so do their relationships. Embracing change rather than resisting it can be a source of relationship renewal. Discuss your goals, dreams, and fears about the future openly.
Consider how you can support each other in achieving individual and shared goals. This journey of mutual growth can bring you closer and strengthen your bond.
9. Reinforce Your Commitment
Reaffirming your commitment to each other is crucial, especially during difficult times and is such an important part of what to do if your relationship is falling apart. This doesn't mean saying "I love you"—it's about showing it through actions. These gestures can be powerful, whether through a renewed commitment to working on the relationship or small daily actions that show your partner you're in it for the long haul.
A Journal of Social and Personal Relationships study demonstrated that commitment plays a crucial role in maintaining satisfying and stable relationships.
10. Create Shared Meaning
Building a shared meaning and purpose can be the glue that holds a relationship together. This involves creating a shared narrative of your life together, including your traditions, dreams, and the values you cherish.
You can navigate the rough patches with unity and purpose by aligning on what truly matters to both of you. Bonus!
What to do if your relationship is falling apart - in a nutshell
So what to do if your relationship is falling apart? The journey to salvaging a relationship that seems to be falling apart is not easy, but it is undoubtedly worth the effort. It requires patience, commitment, and the willingness to grow individually and as a couple.
By taking proactive steps such as communicating openly, seeking professional help, focusing on the positives, and building a shared sense of meaning and purpose, couples can overcome the challenges they face, yes really!
Remember, the most vital relationships are often those that have been tested and have emerged more muscular, more resilient, and more profound. In every challenge lies an opportunity to deepen your connection and reinforce your commitment to each other.
Keep faith in your shared journey and the love that brought you together, for it is in working through these challenges that your relationship can find its greatest strength and depth. Amen.
Now that you know what to do if your relationship is falling apart, you would love my blog "When to leave a relationship? 3 Simple Steps"here.
Always here,
Livia