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LIVIA JOHNSON RELATIONSHIP RECOVERY

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Breaking Free: How to get out of a toxic relationship? 9 Safe Steps

Updated: Feb 10

How to get out of a toxic relationship? 9 Safe Steps 


In the intricate dance of human connection, relationships are meant to feel like sources of joy and support.


Unfortunately, not all ties are healthy; some can manifest as toxic relationships, which can have profound effect negatively on our mental and emotional well-being.


Recognising when it's time to break free and how to get out of a toxic relationship is crucial, and if you find yourself trapped in such a relationship, fret not.


This blog post on 'How to get out of a toxic relationship? 9 safe steps' will guide you through nine comprehensive and safe steps to reclaim your happiness and journey towards a healthier future.


Who doesn't want that, right?


Step One: Recognising the Signs


Firstly, the journey to liberate yourself from a toxic relationship begins with being aware of what the signs actually are. Reflect deeply on your emotions and experiences.


Are you persistently drained, anxious, or undervalued? Delve into the subtleties of manipulation, control, and emotional abuse that may be woven into the fabric of your connection.


Document specific instances, patterns, and the impact on your mental and emotional well-being. I bought a journal to write in, but you can easily keep notes on your phone - whatever you're most comfortable with and most likely to keep up with.


Recognising the signs is akin to turning on a light in the darkness, revealing the path to liberation.


You will start to see certain patterns of behaviour, as well as not feeling like you are 'going mad' when they repeat themselves.



how to get out of a toxic relationship


Step Two 2: Evaluating Your Happiness


Take a moment to fully evaluate your happiness within the relationship and how content you are 'in real terms'. Scrutinise your personal growth, communication dynamics, and shared values.


Consider how the relationship impacts your individuality. Are you thriving, or do you feel stifled?


Acknowledge the nuances of your emotional landscape and how they interplay with the relationship.


Understanding how the connection affects your happiness will not only solidify your decision to break free but also empower you to envision a more fulfilling future, on your own or with someone new. Exciting!


Step 3: Establishing Clear Boundaries


If you have identified you are in a toxic relationship, the next step is to put in place firm boundaries.


Speak openly with your partner, articulating the specific behaviours that are eroding the foundation of the relationship. Be assertive in expressing your feelings and needs.


Healthy boundaries serve as a shield, and set out acceptable and unacceptable behaviour, establishing consequences for violations, and fostering an atmosphere of mutual respect and understanding., establishing consequences for violations, and fostering an atmosphere of mutual behavioural respect and understanding.


Step 4: Seeking Support from Your Network


Breaking free; how to get out from a toxic relationship need not be a solitary endeavour.


Reach out to your support network—friends, family, or a support group—sharing what's been happening within the relationship.


Articulate specific instances of toxicity, ensuring your support network comprehends the gravity of the situation.


The strength derived from having a listening ear and a supportive shoulder during challenging times is immeasurable. You could also contact a relationship coach like me to help navigate and support you further with this.



how to get out of a toxic relationship


Step 5: Prioritising Self-Care


In the labyrinth of ending a toxic relationship, self-care emerges as a guiding light.


Dedicate time for activities that bring you joy and relaxation. Whether it's immersing yourself in a good book, taking contemplative walks, or practising mindfulness, prioritise activities that nourish your soul.


Understand that self-care is not selfish; it's a crucial act of self-love, contributing significantly to your healing and resilience.


Step 6: Planning Your Exit Strategically


How to get out of a toxic relationship and leave necessitates meticulous planning to safeguard your safety and well-being.


If there are concerns about potential harm or escalation, consider seeking professional help, such as the NHS or involving the Police, if necessary.


Develop a comprehensive exit plan, including securing your finances, finding a safe haven, and ensuring a robust support network during the transition.


Plan your exit discreetly, taking into account potential reactions from your partner. Your safety is paramount, and careful planning is a must.



how to get out of a toxic relationship


Step 7: Embracing the Healing Process


Breaking free from a toxic relationship marks the initiation of a transformative healing process.


Allow yourself the time and space to grieve the end of the relationship. Embrace the healing journey, seeking professional counselling, therapy, or relationship coaching if needed.


Recognise that healing is a gradual process; it's acceptable to take one step at a time.


You may feel like it is a rollercoaster ride at times, with ups and downs when you least expect them. But 'this too shall pass,' I always say, to get me through a particularly challenging day emotionally.


Reflect on the lessons learned from the toxic relationship, focus on rebuilding self-esteem and confidence, and surround yourself with positive influences and hobbies that bring joy and fulfilment.



Step 8: Setting Future Goals


As you emerge from the confines of a toxic relationship, take time to set future goals.


Envision the life you want to lead, both personally and in future relationships. Future self-journaling is a tool I love to use with myself and my clients.


Establish short-term and long-term goals that are in line with your values and aspirations.


Setting goals provides direction and purpose, helping you focus on a positive and fulfilling future.


Step 9: Building a Supportive Community


Forge connections with individuals who uplift and support you. Building a supportive community is crucial for your ongoing well-being.


Surround yourself with friends, family, and mentors who understand and encourage your journey toward healing.


Foster relationships that contribute positively to your life, creating a solid network of support as you navigate the challenges of moving on from a toxic relationship.



how to get out of a toxic relationship

So, in a nutshell, how to get out of a toxic relationship?


Liberating yourself from a toxic relationship is a formidable undertaking, but it's an indispensable step towards reclaiming your happiness and well-being. Hooray!


By diligently recognising the signs, evaluating your happiness, establishing boundaries, seeking support, prioritising self-care, planning your exit strategically, embracing the healing process, setting future goals, and building a supportive community, you can navigate this intricate journey safely. 


Remember, you deserve a relationship that nurtures and uplifts you, and by undertaking these 'How to get out of a toxic relationship - nine safe steps', you are forging a path toward a brighter and healthier future.


Amen to that!


Do you think you've been in a toxic relationship? Can you read the signs?


Take my 'toxic relationship quiz' to find out.


Always here,


Livia


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